


One Too Many Stars

by Weresilver



Category: Doom (2005), Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Character Study, Gen, John Grimm is Leonard McCoy, Pre-Star Trek (2009)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-21
Updated: 2020-06-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:47:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24843262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Weresilver/pseuds/Weresilver
Summary: John kept going back out there, kept putting himself and his soul on the line. He counted one too many stars in his life, under too many names, but he kept going back out there.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 44





	One Too Many Stars

**Author's Note:**

> I was (and am) writing my first fic for a brand new fandom of mine, in a completely different tone from this. I was just struck with inspiration late last night. Enjoy~!

He saw the stars one too many times. He passed through the black in many different ways, under many different guises. It never got any easier, but he supposed that now he could claim to have a purpose. Or at least a better one.

Every now and again, he saw himself recounting the steps it took him to get where he was, and particularly, where he stood at that very moment. He counted the bullets, both shot by and at him, those that hit and those that missed. The body count. The people he met and had to leave. The people he couldn't save.

It was easy to feel out of place when everyone around you died.

But he had decided to honor their memory the best he could, to put down the weapons that he had used daily in favor of something that could truly save the lives he once thought he was protecting.

It still wasn't good enough, though. _He_ still wasn't good enough, but he would make do. He survived Mars, he and his sister, in place of nearly two hundred people, with a secret he would have to carry to his grave. He survived the war of '56, after countless casualties, only to be declared dead and hide more than anyone ever knew about the conflict.

He was a survivor, but not of his own choosing. He never truly fought for his own sake, in hindsight, but he supposed it was easier to walk away when no wound stayed open for more than a few minutes.

Physically easier, at any rate. It still hurt all the same.

He saw the stars one too many times, and yet, he stood at the shipyard, watching the cadets boarding the shuttle. Watching the young people who couldn't possibly truly know what awaited out there.

And yet, he was there as well, with a story ready in order to justify a broken man leaving his home planet.

What he wouldn't tell, what he would carry to whatever sort of grave he ended up in, was how easy it was to turn to the blackness of space once the memories of two centuries became too much.

He was no longer Staff Sergeant John Grimm, though, nor Major Tyler Cooper. The first step toward the shuttlecraft to San Francisco was a harsh reminder of the role he had to play from here on, of the _person_ he decided to be. He was Leonard McCoy, M.D., a healer instead of a soldier.

Although Starfleet might also prove to be just as much of a mistake as the Marine Corps and the MACO had been, it was better than staying.

With a final deep breath and no more thoughts on the topic, he stepped into the shuttle and into the new persona.

He would do right by the people he killed and lost.

**Author's Note:**

> Instead of making up new names, I have mixed and matched some other characters to create some aliases to be used in... Well, other stuff. You all will see Tyler Cooper again at some point. Bonus points to whoever recognizes the sources of the name ;)
> 
> Thank you for reading!
> 
> Come say hi to me on [tumblr](https://weresilver-in-space.tumblr.com/)! :D


End file.
